“Our Thoughts Create Our Reality”
By: Dr. John P. DeMann
“I theorized that there was a thinking disorder at the core of the psychiatric syndromes such as depression and anxiety.” Aaron T. Beck, M.D.
I suggest that this is also true for experiencing happiness, fulfillment or any of the positive emotions we all seek in what we do. The fact that we can only think of one thing at a time tells us that an emotion equal to the thought will be attached to the thought. This really means that if we are depressed we are thinking depressing thoughts.
Of course we must take into consideration the chemistry of the mind-body system when we seek answers to questions like: Why am I depressed? Or why am I angry? This reality is in the thought itself. When we ask these questions we only serve the emotion of depression or anger. What would happen if we changed the questions to: What am I happy about or what can I do to experience this situation in a positive way?
If we can only think of one idea at a time then it stands to reason the questions that ask: What am I happy about? Or what can I do to experience this situation in a positive way, can only provide emotions that serve the positive answers we seek from the questions above. In short, the quality of life in many cases is determined by the quality of questions we ask ourselves.
This may seem simple and too basic, but I can say from experience that a person is usually only as happy as they “think” they are. If we can reframe our questions to require positive answers we will experience the emotions attached to the quality of the questions. I believe this one idea can make a big difference in the quality of life one lives.
To experience this first hand we have to first realize we usually create habitual responses to the world we experience. In fact, the world we experience is based on the thoughts we have. Of course you could be experiencing serious issues, but I suggest if you ask the right questions you can create a world many only dream of and to do this you must first recognize your habitual responses to your experiences.
Next you can take notice of the responses you have to situations and consciously begin catching yourself and finding more empowering responses to the situation at hand. It is important to leave all negativity behind. This does not mean you will not have negative responses in the beginning. Remember, you have to break the habit of negative responses and create a new habit of responding positively to all situations. There is not one situation you cannot find a way to experience it in an empowering way. If you can think of any let me know, but I think you will find that simply asking: What can I learn from this experience, you will create positive responses to any scenario.
Try this for 30 days and see what happens. Remember:
1. Recognize your habitual response to most situations.
2. Catch yourself and make a conscious effort to respond with an empowering question.
3. Notice the difference in the emotions you experience when you reframe questions or thoughts.
4. Keep a journal of your experience in this exercise.
5. Let me know how it worked.
You may respond openly on the journal page here or you may respond to me privately at firstname.lastname@example.org. I hope to hear from you!
Experience the Good Life,
Dr. John P. DeMann, CPEC, PCC/ICF, ISSA